Rethink

I'm rethinking a lot of things. There's so much that has gone undocumented, and given that what pays my rent is documentation, I really should be standing shame-faced here, and wringing my hands, trying to find a suitable excuse. Which is what I generally do when I've been absent for a while from this page. Strangely enough, now it doesn't seem to elicit the same emotion in me. Of course, I don't like that the gap has been so long this time, but I'm not overly disappointed in myself yet.


Today, I just felt like taking a little trip to this neglected page, to let it know that it is loved. I do love my blog. I am even contemplating beginning another, on the company portal, just narrating life as it happens to a technical writer in an organization that is desperately trying to keep from sinking. A little glimpse of the way policies and processes and various other incidents look like to someone pretty much at the bottom of the organizational pyramid. Just my take on everything.


I love my new workplace. I really do. The work culture, and the people make me want to stay on and make a difference, in any way that I can. Of course, all my blabbering about writing another blog may come to nothing at all, like a lot of my nascent plans. But if it does, I will be talking about it again.


Hmmm. That's all for now folks. You might see me again, or I might go into hibernation again. Today has been a talking day.

Ellipsis

And I thought May would make me smile.

Never really had it my way did I ?


Hoping this is ... and not .


*not breaking rule*

Internationally Separated Disease

ISD.

Recurring theme in my life, or so it seems.


One, thankfully, is recuperating, and in a couple of months will be free of all symptoms.

And how glad am I for that little mercy.

Bloop!

I think it's the first time since I started this blog that a whole month has gone past without a single post. February 2009 seems a little barren doesn't it? But it wasn't.

Perfection has reigned supreme for two years now. And it shows no sigh of budging. And how glad am I for that. I will not elaborate. I do not want to. Suffice it to say that my mind is doing cartwheels at the thought of an impending return. And that momentous occasion will find its way here, then.

Work is like it should be, with the added bonus of delightful company. Otherwise, the madhouse it would have been for me.

(Yes, this blog sounds weirdly like a journal entry, or an update, or just a random post, but that's what it is. I haven't been here for a while, and I want to bring this page up to where it should have been, had the internet connection been my slave.)

There is nothing more satisfying than the sound of a loved one's laughter, in this case, laughter that has been missing for a while. It seems to be on its way back, and how that puts stars in my eyes. Viking marauders may be grim in all their portraits, but I like mine to be a grinning goof. He's mine, so anyone who has an issue with that, here's what I have to say - *bleeeeeeeeeep*.

A soon-to-happen departure has happened. And another is around the corner. It's alright, really. I'll see them when I see them, and meanwhile, bless Google.



Ah, it's nice to be on familiar pages again. I miss this black screen when I don't see it for too long. I'm sure I've said it before here, and I'll say it yet again. Regularity is not my middle name. But I try. I'm sure that counts for something. It's the thought, right?

Bla di blaaaaaaaaaaa.

Okay.

This ramble has to stop. But I'll be back. With more of me as I always am.

Toodles!

Of missing Vikings and weeping Valkyries

In Norse mythology, a valkyrie (Old Norse valkyrja "chooser of the slain") is one of a host of female figures who choose who will win or die in battle.

A Viking is one of the Norse (Scandinavian) explorers, warriors, merchants, and pirates who raided and colonized wide areas of Europe from the late eighth to the early eleventh century.



Everytime I start writing about this, I end up thinking more than typing, and I am yet to figure out if that is a good thing, or a bad thing. Profundity does not seem deep enough, and a light frolicking post seems too frivolous. It's a puzzle I don't have a solution to.

Maybe if I say it out loud, the first time that I will, things will be easier.


I haven't seen the Viking for 8 months. Almost.

For the 12 months preceding those, there was a naughty dimple that greeted me, almost every morning, smiling eyes that said "You've no idea how beatiful you are", and a saucy grin that said "You're mine". I miss that.

Every time I'd cross a road, a strong hand guided me through the traffic, the grip relaxing only when I was on a pavement. A protective arm was around my shoulder, making sure every one around knew I wasn't alone. I miss that.

Cups of coffee changed our lives. Smokes shared, and thrown away, and smoked again. People in all shapes and sizes, mismatched voices, random strangers, roadside pictures - silly things made me laugh till I cried. I miss that.

Long rides on the highway, the wind screaming in my ears, dancing around danger, and reaching climactic highs on the black beast. Midnight tea, rain-drenched riding, home-office-lunch-office-home-dinner, Casablanka, CCD. I miss that.

We sneaked in and out of home - quick stolen kisses, meeting family and trying to keep the hands in check, and marriages. Drinks with Chiks, corn on the cob, late night movies, near-fatal accidents, grumbling about traffic. I miss that.

Any weakness I showed, was propped up with a word, even a look. Tears wiped and smiles shared, making memories of a different hue. Every laugh resounded with the vibrant chords of love. I miss that.

Every moment away was veiled with waiting, and every moment together, was a work in progress, building up to the masterpiece that is our life. Togetherness was a way of life. I miss that.

I miss the waiting and the making. I miss painting on my canvas, with colours you create for me.

I miss you.



Sigh.

I may sound lovesick. I may sound silly, some will even say pretentious. This is no attention-mongering. I don't want to make a point to anyone. I just wanted to say it out loud.


This is the loudest I can get.